Muffiny Haiku Muffins from the Great Land of America Muffins

So, I said we'd be back, and we are.
Also, this is a new post, a new post occuring less than one month after the last one.
You didn't expect that now, did you?
Which leaves it at me:1 and your expectations of me:0
And this also leaves this post resembling a really bad haiku.
Like, a haiku that a dyslexic amnesiac would write.

I think this haiku is about a loan shark
and a fishing expedition gone horribly wrong.
but no one can be sure.

However, just to ensure that I remain the WINNING party, or BI-WINNING, should you prefer.
Let me set some things straight about what you can expect about the update schedule here:
Look at your calender.
Notice all those nice, even, measured intervals.
Those intervals have trained you.
Trained you to expect things at those intervals, in sequence, in a predictable manner even.
Well.
Fuck.
All.
That.
Bullshit.
We have no schedule.
Why?
Because we're trying to help you.
We're trying to help you overcome all that mundane bullshit.
All those safe expectations about what to expect and when.
We're breaking you of habits
Habits you didn't know you had.
Habits that are eating your life away, forcing you to live like an automated drone.
Instead of a human being: spontaneous, free, and full of good ol'
AMERICAN FREEDOM.
CUZ THIS IS FUCKING AMERICA.
FUCK YEAH.

Yeah!  This place.
Well, most of this place.
But, um, mostly just the middle-ish bit.
well kinda lower-middle-ish
and the one bit in the top leftish corner area.
But the rest of those places: fuck 'em.
I didn't even know it was legal to put Russia
 on the same map as America.

Or,
at least that's what I tell myself.
But really,
Lets see you be creative
ON A SCHEDULE.
You'll fail.
And when you do,
you should come back here,
and maybe appreciate this fucking faux-haiku.
And Power-Rangers.
They're definitely underrated.
Respect the Zords.

Or they'll find you.